This week’s transformational truths in our study Embracing Joy by Jean Wilund caused me to squirm. There were moments I wanted to put the book down. to turn away from the truth because as they say, “the truth hurts.” The reality is the hardest person to deal with in my life is MYSELF.
I share them with you because I believe transformative growth comes when we ask ourselves the really hard questions. Let me warn you… this may sting a little.
Question Number 1: What is you knee-jerk reaction to your life circumstances?
My friend and I have had this conversation before and her answer is kind of a joke between us now. Her knee-jerk reaction, “How is this going to effect me?” There are a few in my family whose knee-jerk reaction is to face life with an I’ll-take-that-challenge attitude while others sort of run for cover to the safest place. Me personally… I’m a thinker. My knee-jerk reaction to any circumstance in life, no matter how big or small, good or hard, joy inspiring or troubling is to roll it around in my thoughts asking things like…
How can I fix this? Can I do better next time? Did I fail in some way? Is this or that enough?
Think… think… think
Until I’m sick of thinking.
Turns out my answer to the question is “thinking.” Thinking, trying to figure something out or prevent something by thinking through it over and over is my knee-jerk reaction. The thing I’m anchored to. And while it is good to think before you act, in it’s most out of balance state it can be stagnating. Especially in hard or stressful times, when there is no time or way to think through it all.
My answer to this question reveals dependence on myself instead of the One who is dependable no matter what. Perfectly dependable in every way and every form. The first step in transformation is noticing the truth. The second… asking God to change it.
Lord, I want You to be my knee-jerk reaction to life. The One I depend on to figure out all things.
Number 2: What are your trials exposing about your faith?
Those hard places we find ourselves in often reveal who or what our faith is built on. And there are times God allows, even leads us into the hard for our own good. To transform and grow us in ways we can’t even imagine.
Recently, I realized when my expectations weren’t being met my frustration with others increased. Honestly, I was a grumpy girl with an ungrateful heart. As I vented my frustration heavenward I heard the Spirit whisper, “You’ve forgotten to thank Me for this answer to your decades long prayer.” Ugh… that hurt. The trial exposed my ungrateful heart, and I did not like what I saw.
Lord, I’m sorry I’ve allowed my unmet expectations to get in the way of giving thanks. Teach me to live faithfully in the unexpected.
Next Question: What do you think you need to know and why?
Oh my! Listen to the author’s words:
While we want to know every detail about what concerns us, we say we need to know.
I need to know if all my loved ones will be saved because how can I be happy if I don’t know?
I need to know I’ll have enough money to live each day because how can I not fear the future if I don’t know?
Jean Wilund, Embracing Joy
Perhaps you have your own statement. I know I do. I say things like, I need to know what caused the fire that turned our lives upside down because how can I not be scared if I don’t know. Or… I need to know where my kids are all the time because how can I live peacefully if something bad might happen to them?
God understands our desire to know, but when we say we need to know, we’ve stepped out of innocent curiosity and into prideful demanding.
Our faith is resting in our desired outcome, not in Christ.
Jean Wilund, Embracing Joy
It seems the things I need to know reveal I have a trust issue.
Lord, the truth is I’m on a need to know basis with You. Help me trust You will reveal all I need to know.
Last Question: If someone took a look at your calendar, the places you spend your time, energy, and money, who or what would they say you worship?
By now you may be squirming too. I get it it. This questions dives deep into our personal business. But I can’t get these words out of my head.
God made us to worship.
Jean Wilund, embracing Joy
What we worship makes us.
I don’t know about you but there is not one thing that I can think of that I want to give the power or influence to MAKE me. Not the television programs I watch or the music I listen to… not social media, or other people’s opinions… not sucess or wealth… nothing. not one thing.
Lord, reveal the idols that make me into something You did not design me to be.
Transformation is hard work, but not in the way I used to believe it to be. It’s not about willpower, or building good habits on my own. Nor is it about grit or mental toughness. There’s no self-help formula that transforms hearts.
Our job in transformation is to ask the hard questions and face the truth about our faith with the same grace and compassion that drove Jesus to the cross.
All the rest… the changing and growing and making us new… that’s God’s job.
So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow.
1 Corinthians 3:7
Transformation is never easy, nor painless, but friends it is so worth it. It’s the very reason Jesus lived and died. If you dare ask the questions, and the answers make you squirm just know you are not alone.
I am right there with you.
Stacy
Unraveled Love 
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